Sunday, 21 November 2010


I am officially on holidays mofos!

Had my last day of work today and tomorrow Stevo, Bayley and I are hopping in a jet plane and flying off to Darwin for two weeks of fun and relaxation.

I don't think I have ever needed a holiday more than I feel like I need this one. 2010 has been an intense year. It has been a mostly really good, very eventful and very fast. I have enjoyed it and I'll be sad when it's all over but 2011 is shaping up to be just as epic! So with every thing that has been going on this year, I am going to enjoy the shit out of this holiday!

So when we get back we are moving house, literally the day after we get back (fun!) and the new house has no internet access :'( We are going to get it eventually but I will be without proper access for a while so things will be extra quiet here and on Twitter for a while. I am hoping to get lots of work done on all my blogs though during my uni break while I have time to spare and am going to be putting a lot of energy into turning this into something that makes me a little cash on the side. So stay tuned pleeease!

Till then! Au revoir!! A bientot! Ciao! Catch ya later!

Love lots Carrie xoxo xxxx

Tuesday, 16 November 2010

How is Ke$ha allowed in the country?

I had a small discussion with my lovely cousin Teejay on Facebook about the travesty that is Ke$ha when it occurred to me... this bitch has committed numerous crimes! Surely she has an extensive criminal record? Why has Australian Border Security allowed her into our country? Forget boat people!! I want to hear Julia Gillard explain why this security breach has happened!

Lets look at Ke$ha's criminal history,

Crimes against music - Go listen to one of her songs. Enough said. Actually...please don't...I don't want to feel responsible for your bleeding ears.

Crimes against fashion -

Crimes against general hygiene - see above pics, see how she doesn't seem to own a hairbrush? Or makeup remover. Or have access to a shower? She looks dirty all the time. Also she brushes her teeth with 'a bottle of jack'. Eww Ke$ha.

Crimes against sense - 'Zip your lip like a padlock' We've already discussed this one...

Crimes against class - "don't be a little bitch with your chit chat, just show me where your dick's at". Hi my name is Ke$ha and I am a trashy slut, show me your penis! (and I'll show you mine)

So Ms Gillard what do you have to say about this? I think you owe the Australian population an explanation. This is a complete outrage! I think you should immediately have Ke$ha's visa revoked and have her skanky arse thrown out of the country. I know we are a country founded by convicts but this is just beyond a joke. Think of the children! Do the right thing Julia. I have faith in you.

Love Carrie xoxo xxxx

Saturday, 13 November 2010

Apply Now!!

Are you an uptight bitch?

Do you like to avoid calling people back? Especially when it seems important?

Do you have that special knack for finding the most inopportune time to come visit someones house?

Are you a stickler for rules? (Unless the rule inconveniences you, then rules can stick it)

Can you see a tiny speck of dirt on a wall from 10 meters away?

Believe that tiny speck of dirt is worth a $1200 penalty?

Do you believe that even when it's the middle of winter and hasn't stopped raining for two weeks, people can still go out and do their god-damn gardening?

Do have little sympathy for your fellow human beings?

Have what people describe as an irritating voice?

Were you sent here from hell just to fuck with people?

If you said yes to all of the above questions, congratulations!! You qualify to apply to be a real estate agent!! Call us on 666-666-666 now!

Real Estate Agents, making life a misery since forever.

Monday, 8 November 2010

If your kid is fat, it is your fault

Shannon Ponton from Australias version of The Biggest Loser caused a wee bit of a stir a few days ago when he claimed that parents are enabling their children to become obese.

I, completely agree with him, allow me to insert my opinion and then tell you why all the excuses I hear are a load of shit.

Kids are kids. They don't go out and buy their own food, they aren't the ones cooking meals for the family. The parent is, and if they parent is serving up unhealthy food. massive portions or just picking up KFC on the way home then of course it is the parents fault that the child suffers because of this. Is a kid going to turn around and say "awww Mum/Dad, I don't want pizza! Can't you cook me some broccoli?" Kids, when they are little, don't really know the cause and effect of eating shitty food, they just trust that our parents are doing the best for their health and wellbeing. As the parents should be!

Exercise, for those of you who don't know, I have a two year old stepson named Bayley, he is a little dynamite. He always wants to be running around and playing and doing fun physical things. Of all the little kids that I know, they are all like this! It's in their nature to want to run around and be active, it's not like as parents we have to force our little ones to go out and run around the backyard, it's what they want to be doing! Sure when kids get a bit older the lure of video games, internet and television is there but you know what? It's the parents job, it's their responsibility, to make sure their kids are getting the exercise they need. How hard is it to impose a 'no tv/internet/videogame before *some time*' rule? Or implement a one hour per day limit on those things?Get your kids to walk to and from school. Enrol them in a sporting class, Bayley does kiddie gymnastics and he loves it! Can't afford that, no problems! Just encourage them to go to the park or the oval with their friends after school and run around with a footy or something. Getting kids to exercise isn't hard unless you have already put them into a routine or a mindset that hates exercise and physical activity. It's something you can get the whole family involved in, go for family walks after dinner, go to the park every Sunday or two and play games. Aarrrggghhh it's not rocket science!

Two of my favourite excuses I hear from parents commenting on forums and the like...

"I don't have time to get healthy meals or go to the park with my kids, I work full time, it's hard to get to a grocery store, I just pick up whatever I can on the way home!"
Ok first of all, if you 'don't have time' for your kids, then what the hell were you thinking having a kid in the first place? Rethink your priorities here and make some time for them. Secondly, generally people work five days a week, so  at least one of the two days you are not working, the grocery store will be open and you can go there and buy lots of healthy food for your family. Check out cookbooks for meals you can make fast after work. Buy a slowcooker, you can throw food in there in the morning, turn it on and when you get home BAM! Healthy non junk food meal is ready to go! Split up the cooking duties with your partner to lessen the burden. If all else fails at the very least pick up some takeaway that is healthy! Go to Subway, get Thai food with lots of vegetables just be generally smarter with your food.

No time for the park, or even no park nearby? No problem, you can still do the family walk after dinner, even if it's a 15 minute walk around the block it is much better than nothing, and again, encourage your kids to join school sporting teams or put them in a class once a week. There are heaps of ways to get around time restraints. Time is man made, make it work for you not against you.

"but my kid is such a fussy eater! He/She doesn't like vegetables and healthy food. Commercials on TV make them want fast food. If I say no they cry and have tantrums. It's not my fault"
What? Your kid cries when they don't get their own way? Welcome to being a parent! You know what? You kid isn't going to like every single thing you ask of them and if you can't say "no little Bobby you can't have McDonalds we're having a nice home cooked dinner tonight" then how the hell do you expect you'll be able to say "no Bobby you can't go to Joe's house with a case of Bundy and a funnel"? You are the parent and you set the rules. Kids are only fussy eaters if their parents allow them to be fussy eaters. If your kid doesn't seem to enjoy veges, try being more creative. Kids loves chips? Make homemade chips and use potatoes and carrots and pumpkin. Instead if a packet of crisps for a snack give them carrot and cheese sticks. Commercials don't feed your kids, you do! So if you choose to give in to the demands of your children then hey, it is your fault buddy! Be a parent! Just say no, you know what is better for them food wise than they do, so stop with excuses. Parenting isn't meant to be easy, sometimes your kids will cry, they'll get over it and so will you and I bet they'd grow up and be happy you didn't let them develop a weight problem.

Kids just should not be fat, it is heartbreaking to see sad little fat kids and it does nothing but set them up in their older years to struggle with their weight. Feed your kids shit for 18 years and don't encourage them to exercise? How the hell are they going to know any better? How much harder is it going to be for them to break that cycle? There might be a push for us all to just accept our body shape for what it is, but you accept your obese body shape and all you are doing is putting yourself in an early grave. The risk of heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, stroke, cancer, gallstones, infertility, joint problems and back pain are all increased when you are obese. Think about that next time you 'don't have time', to get your child a healthy meal or to help them exercise, or the next time you 'can't say no' to their demands of lollies and junk. It is about time we all stop passing the buck and start taking responsibility for things that actually are our responsibility!

What do you think? Agree? Disagree? What other excuses have you heard parents make to justify their bad food decisions? Were you a fat kid?

Leave it in the comments guys

Love Carrie xoxo xxxx

Sunday, 7 November 2010

I am the worst blogger ever

So I have this problem.

I am on this positivity kick where I try not to be negative. It's a long story and it's actually doing wonders for my life but the problem is this. My favourite blogs to write are rants, rants are generally negative, I can't rant when I am on a positivity kick. Arrrggghhh!!

I have told myself a million times to just get on here and tell you about this awesome positive affirmation thing I am on right now but I feel like it would be really super boring for you all. However I don't know why I think that because I think only about 5 people read my blog anyway and only like two of those people actually write comments so really my feelings are totally unjustified because I don't know what you people want to hear about.

It's quite frustrating.

So, tell me. Do you want to hear about my life changing affirmation system? Or do you just want me to come back when I have bitchy things to say (you might be better or following me on Twitter for that).

Help me out here!!

Love Caz xoxo xxxx